April 1. The planning department is considering a plan to build a water attraction on the site of a proposed business park on Bailey Road. The waterpark would tap into water pipes that supply nearby Bailey’s Glen and adjoining neighborhoods.

Final designs on the park were not available, but the developer was asked to cap all slides at a maximum of 200 feet in order to abide by a plea from the town’s Architectural Review Committee, which could have required the height limits but was afraid such a demand would signal to developers that Cornelius is not open for business.

Quotable

“This is our last chance to get this right,” said a town official. “We believe this fits with the overall vision of Cornelius and allows us to maintain our small-town feel.”

Details

The park would accommodate 1,500 visitors per day during the busy season, which will be September to June when school is in session. Water will be treated and warmed using a bank of solar panels the size of two football fields across from Bailey Road Park.

The pickleball court project at the park will be canceled to accommodate the solar farm.

Details

The planning department sent the first proposal back to the developer for revisions because it didn’t contain any commercial use concepts. The new plan reserves acreage for a chain pizza restaurant, a gas station, car wash and nail salon.

Details

To address ongoing concern about the deforestation of Cornelius, the park will also erect four dozen artificial palm trees.

Quotable again

“There are no trees over there now so this is great!” said the town official. “We have heard our residents loud and clear and we want to make sure their concerns are met with all future development projects, unlike the ones we did yesterday.”

—Happy April Fools Day. This isn’t even slightly true. Today’s newsletter will be out at lunchtime.